whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
