I puked a lego.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
