glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
