I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
