Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
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