hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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