It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
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