addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Randomize