is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
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