soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
