Jerry, you need to find god
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Why did my mother make you get naked?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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