i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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