i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
