Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize