ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
bring money and cleavage
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
