Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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