4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Your penis caused this!
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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