My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
they're like a gay fantastic four
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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