if only i could text you this smell
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
