I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
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