just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
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