WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize
