I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
