therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
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