I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
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