I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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