FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Randomize
