The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Hippo gnu deer
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
