he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
