Sponge bath it is.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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