I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Small penises have feelings too.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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