Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
