So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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