I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
