glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I wish you could order shots online.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
