So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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