I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
