He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
