i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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