You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
