She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Randomize
