like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
