Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
