i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
