shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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