She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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