i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
