Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
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