I just saw a hot homeless man
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
we should paint friendship bongs
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