Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
