She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
I will die if light touches me.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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