Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize